Why Do I Sabotage My Relationships?

by - 1:51 PM


Q.


 I seem to always find myself in a relationship, even when I'm not looking to be in one. Around the third year, I start to get antsy and seem to sabotage the relationship somehow. We get very close to an engagement and a marriage and I take off running. I've thrown away many wonderful men and relationships and make myself feel like I don't deserve a happily ever after. What's wrong with me?

—Runaway Bride

A.

Dear Runaway,
There are three simple steps to loving: hook ‘em, hug ‘em, and hold ‘em. Apparently, you do the first two quite well. And girl, I know tons of women who’d like to learn your secret of always being in a relationship! 
But you’re correct: you feel you don’t deserve love. To pump up your ego—and theirs—you play guys’ heart strings like harp strings. Men stick with you because hunters love the challenge of winning their prey. But three long years of superficial love games? Are you kidding? Either you should win an Oscar, or your paramours are awfully dense!
Reality check, please! You and your men need depth perception. Loving requires mutual caring beyond the shallow wining and dining!  How many three-year letdowns do you think your dating life will withstand?
 —Dr. Gilda
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