Tuesday, October 11, 2011



Sat, 8 Oct 2011

World Famous Relationship Expert, Dr.  Gilda Carle examines the difference between two high profile couples in Hollywood: 

Antonio/Melanie vs. Demi/Ashton

By Dr. Gilda Carle


When I counsel women, they always seem harder on themselves than the men I counsel. Why? Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that men hold us to a strict standard. Life & Style Magazine reported that Demi Moore had addiction issues, and that she was in rehab years ago for these problems. She had been “sober” for a long time, but the magazine claims these issues have resurfaced. And Ashton has found them very difficult to deal with.

Certainly, we can understand someone finding it difficult to cope with a spouse’s addiction of any kind. That is a very tough haul, and a return to the addiction is commonplace. But note the double standard: a woman will tend to hang onto the marriage if her husband has this problem. However, if the wife is the addict, the husband will exit.

The reason I wrote the piece for Celebzter about Melanie’s addiction and Antonio’s patience with her (Mel, please LINK to that piece) is because this husband seems like a mature guy who has taken “for better or for worse” literally. In contrast, Ashton’s less mature coping mechanism has been to seek instant gratification in the adoring arms of twenty-somethings. That will really solve the addiction problem, won’t it?

Anyone can conjure up rationalizations for cheating. From what has been reported, it sure seems that Ashton needs a heavy dose of maturity, a re-assessment of what true commitment is, and a great deal of compassion for his wife in need. Based on the studies, if the roles were reversed, Demi would probably hang in there! Before I’m misquoted, I’m certainly not recommending that anyone SHOULD remain with an addict. But I’m disappointed in Ashton for selecting a coping mechanism that blares, “I need a pacifier!” instead of one that questions, “How can I build better compassion for the woman with whom I shared some wonderful years?” Ashton, take your thumb out of your mouth and grow up!!

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