Wednesday, September 30, 2009

California Dreamin'

I just returned from LA. It was a beautiful trip, the weather was gorgeous, and I saw many wonderful friends I have missed. One of my most memorable experiences was spending time with Robert Spencer, partner for 65 years to the legendary Hollywood icon, Mr. Blackwell. “Spencer,” as his friends call him, ran the huge Blackwell fashion business. Now he is 88 years old, and in fairly good health. He is a relative to Princess Diana Spencer, and he has stories of when he and Blackwell visited the Royal Palace in London. What a gentleman he is! There are photos around their estate showing both men in their earlier days. How handsome, dapper, and opulent their surroundings! They had a splendid life together, a relationship from which we can all learn.

Spencer is saddened by the loss of his partner, as am I. It is now one year since Mr. Blackwell died. He was a supportive mentor to me. I remember once when I introduced him to two young women who said they wanted to produce me. He took me aside and said, “They don’t know what they’re talking about.” Blackwell had had his own TV spectacular for a number of years, and he knew the medium well. For sure, he was right, and I moved along to greener pastures. More recently, I told him about my latest TV show idea. He grasped it immediately, recognized the public’s need for it, and encouraged me to pursue it. That show is still in the works. Mr. Blackwell was no B.S.; he said everything as he saw it. Yet, few people knew what a wonderful marshmallow he was beyond his tough exterior.

While I was in LA, a friend visited me with a psychic by her side. She gave me a reading as a gift. He told me something sensational that 3 other psychics from all over the country had also been predicting. Do these people all belong to the same union?? I’ll let you know if and when that comes to pass. Very intriguing!!

It was grand going to Agape with another friend, as we always do on Sunday mornings. Michael Beckwith’s sermon struck some important chords in me that I will remember forever. And another darling friend and I had a glorious dinner where we planned a new and exciting business venture. I also met my agent for lunch, and had a few other lunches and dinners by the beach in magnificent Santa Monica. Breathtaking!

All in all, the reason I THOUGHT I was being called to LA turned out to be something entirely different. And doesn’t that really describe most of life? But I noted how I had grown. While meeting with a producer friend of mine, I was prepared to hand him a TV show treatment I had created. However, I sensed his negativity about the industry, so I changed my mind. These days, I avoid negatives even after I’ve worked hard to prepare an agenda of my own. This is a big step for me who is used to customarily barreling through my plans whether or not my listener is receptive. On this trip, I listened carefully to what people had to say, I was open to what I heard, whether I liked it or not, and I was not afraid to change my course.

I returned home to NY in a rested state of mind. But as a result of the insights I gained, my business partner and I are proceeding on a different path with our TV show. We both feel very good about the change. As I’ve learned from Robert, “Two roads diverged in a road, and I, I chose the one less traveled by. And that has made all the difference.” I don’t yet know what that “difference” truly is. But one of the things the California psychic heard during my reading was a Frank Sinatra song, “The Best is Yet to Be.” I hope he’s right. I’ll let you know!

Relationship expert Dr. Gilda Carle (Ph.D.), is a media personality, a product spokesperson, has a private practice, and is an associate professor at Mercy College, in New York. Her best-selling books include "Don't Bet on the Prince!," "99 Prescriptions for Fidelity," and "How to Win When Your Mate Cheats." Please visit her at

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